Title ~ Butt Ninjas From Hell
Authors ~ Kage Alan, JP Barnaby, Ally Blue, T.C. Blue, Shae Conner, Jevocas Green, Kiernan Kelly, Eden Winters
Publisher ~ Wild City Press
Published ~ 16th April 2014
They move like shadows through the night... when they aren't tripping over the furniture. Porn stars, holy emissaries, demons, and even just plain humans—ninjas come in all forms and from all kinds of Hell in this erotically charged comedic Wilde City anthology. Whether it’s the world of second-rate television, fluttering ninja stars, obsessions over a bronzy-olive toned soldier, or magic backsides, your authorial guides will take you where few readers have ever dared to go… without protection.
Butt Ninjas from Hell: You’ll Never Hear Them Coming!
Clean Up on Aisle Me! by Shae Connor
Sheathing His Sword by JP Barnaby
Twink Ninja Tiger, Flaxen Buns Of Fury by Kage Alan
Twerk It by Ally Blue
Hell Is Where The Heart Is by Eden Winters
Ninja, Vanish! by Kiernan Kelly
The Soldier And The Vagabond by Jevocas Green
A Ninja Walks Into A Bar by T.C. Blue
Adventures of a Camera Man by JP Barnaby
(Companion short story to Sheathing his Sword)
Christian Alvarez refused to sigh and add condensation to his camera lens. Everything else had gone wrong on this shoot; he wouldn’t contribute his own frustration to the list. He’d been filming for Raging Hearts long enough to know the edited footage would be usable, but Jesus who would have anticipated the fucking bookshelf collapsing. The top, Corey, Christian had worked with a few times and he could keep it up through an earthquake. Though, Webster’s finest did get his attention when it landed on the back of his head. The bottom, some little twink they’d picked up in a bar somewhere wasn’t quite so unshakable. In fact, it had taken almost an hour to get him out of the upstairs bathroom and back on set.
After three years of it, he didn’t see any differences to scenes through his lens anymore. Everything turned into a case of suck, fuck, cum, rinse, and repeat. Kind of like his sex life. People thought working in the porn industry was the best job in the world, and for the most part, it was—but sometimes he needed something more. He needed something real.
“I’m close,” the twink cried with unnecessary enthusiasm, as if he really really wanted that part in the school play. Christian refrained from rolling his eyes only because he needed to get the shot so he could fucking go home. They’d been at it for almost twelve hours and that bagel had been hours ago.
He tightened the shot, focusing on the kid’s hand as it flew over his cock. Well, at least the boy got that part right. His derision wasn’t fair, he knew that, but the camera started to weigh a hundred pounds an hour ago. The knot between his shoulders would most likely be permanent.
Christian moved back, refocusing on the fly as cum exploded from the kid like a geyser, coating his hand, stomach, chest, and even shooting over his right shoulder and onto the table beneath him. Okay, Christian was impressed. As Julio, the other camera guy tightened on the model’s faces, he backed up taking wider shot of Corey pumping his hips, closing his eyes, and thinking of Christmas as he dragged that last few feet to the finish line. He nodded without a word to let the crew know that he could finish without resetting the shot.
After a minute, Corey pulled out carefully and snapped the condom off his dick. He worked himself with quick, business-like strokes, and grunted as he emptied his load on the kid’s stomach, their cum mingling across a smooth, beautiful canvas.
“God, that was so good,” Corey crooned and gave the kid a lingering kiss. Christian watched in his mind as the video faded to black and Hartley called cut.
“Thank fuck,” Corey muttered and climbed off the twink.
“Alex coming to pick you up?” Hartley asked Corey who nodded.
“Yeah, you need him to come in?”
“I’ve got his schedule.”
“Okay, I’ll text him.” Corey grabbed his shorts off the floor and then turned for the stairs. He took them two at a time as he went up for a shower. The kid followed a little, slower, and a bit more bow-legged.
“Christian, Julio, can you guys hand me the cameras so I can download the footage? I want to get it swept in tonight’s backup. Christ knows I don’t want to have to reshoot that fucking nightmare.” Hartley held his hand out to Julio who handed him the camera. Christian followed suit. The fire wire went in, and they waited for the transfer. The cameras weren’t running for the entire twelve hours, but they were probably close to capacity.
A voice carried through the house as they watched the little bar moving across the screen as the transfer progressed.
“He’s in the shower, and we’re in the kitchen, Alex,” Hartley called. Christian looked up to a tiny blond kid, clean cut and happy bounce in through the doorway.
“Hey Alex,” Julio said, giving the newcomer a bone crushing hug. “How’s school?”
“It’s great. I’m almost done.”
“I’ve got about half a dozen videos ready for post-production. Can your schedule handle some editing work as well as a shoot this week?”
“Yeah, mid-terms were last week, I’m good.”
Just then, Corey (or Mike as they knew him off set) wrapped his arms around Alex’s slim waist. Alex giggled with the kiss that came just behind his ear.
“Hey, we’re going to get food. I’m fucking starving. Anybody wanna join us?” Mike asked and disentangled himself from Alex, but held on to his hand.
“Will there be booze involved?” Christian asked.
“Fuck yes.” Mike snorted.
“Then I’m in.”
“How about you guys?” Mike asked Hartley and Julio.
“Nah, we’re gonna order a pizza and go over the production schedule for the next couple of weeks,” Hartley replied, not taking his eyes from the screen.
They stayed a few minutes more while Christian collected his shit and then climbed into Mike’s jeep headed toward Hillcrest and Baja Betty’s. With an entire page of tequilas on the menu and some of the best food in the city, Betty’s was the place to go to kick back and relax. They even caught a break, finding a spot near the front door heavily guarded by leaning palm trees.
They grabbed a table near the windows. Christian and Mike both ordered Mexican Bulldogs, while Alex stuck with a Diet Coke since he’d be drinking Mike’s drunk ass back to their shared apartment. The fishbowl sized margaritas arrived with their upside-down Coronas and rubber duckie floating on the surface. Mike squeezed the tiny duck, filling it with the drink, and shot it at Alex who squealed like a teenage girl.
“What the hell? If we get pulled over, I’m going to smell like tequila, jackass.” Alex wiped the wetness from his face and dabbed at his shirt as both Mike and Christian guffawed. Without pretense, Alex grabbed the duck from Mike’s drink, a little surfer duck complete with board and sunglasses, and chucked it at his head.
They ordered guacamole and chips and Christian noticed that the margarita, which had been strong, started to go down a little smoother with a quarter of it gone. The room warmed nicely and he sat back against the booth, drink in hand.
“This is nice,” Christian commented as he watched a lithe tattooed blond stroll across the open space and saddle up to the bar. He caught Christian’s eye with a wink before ordering something from the young Latino woman service up drinks.
“It just got nicer,” Mike said, his eyes on the same blond.
“No fucking way, you just got laid. My turn,” Christian scoffed.
“Oh, as if. I can go more than once a day, old man.”
“Hello, I’m still here,” Alex said as he smacked Mike on the arm.
“I was gonna share.” Mike put an arm around Alex.
“While ya’ll are arguin’,” a deep Southern drawl said forcing Christian’s eyes up into the tattooed blond’s crystal blue eyes. “Do ya mind if I sit with ya?”
“Not at all,” Mike said, holding out a hand to offer the seat next to Christian whose cock perked up as the guy slid into the booth.
“What’s your name?” Alex asked with a fleeting glare at Mike.
“I’m Mike, this is Alex, and the hairy guy next to you is Christian.”
“You’re an ass, Burrows,” Christian spat at Mike and then turned to Travis. “How long have you been in San Diego?”
“Is it that obvious?” Travis laughed, the sound like a warm cocoon around Christian’s spine. “I moved here for work about a week ago. The only thing I’ve found so far is this place. I came over here to ask where’s a good place to go dancin’ tonight.”
“Oh, we were thinking about much more than dancing when looking at you, man,” Mike said with a smirk.
“That so?” he asked but kept his eyes on Christian.
“Maybe,” Christian admitted, the alcohol and attention causing his face to flush.
“We just got off work, we were gonna have a drink or three and then go out. You’re welcome to come with us.” Mike leered, but he seemed all but forgotten in the heat of Travis’s gaze toward Christian.
“You lost, Mike, face it,” Alex muttered.
“What do ya’ll do?” Travis asked to the table, but his focus never left Christian.
“We’re porn stars and he’s a cameraman,” Mike indicated first he and Alex, and then Christian who flushed even deeper.
“So, you watch guys fuck all day, but never get the opportunity yourself?” Travis asked, a smile in his words.
“Well, I can’t say it never presents itself.” Christian took a shot and slid his hand onto Travis’s leg under the table.
“Oh, there’s certainly an opportunity in the offering.”
“Would you guys just go fuck already? Meet us at Rich’s after,” Mike huffed, finally exasperated.
“I like that ide… wait, my car is at Hartley’s. Shit.”
“Go with the boy, we’ll get your car later,” Mike offered and Christian liked the hope and lust he found in Travis’s expression.
“My place is about half a mile from here,” Christian offered, leaving the invitation hanging in the air for a moment before Travis snatched it up.
“My bike’s out front.”
“Oh, a bike. Damn you Christian,” Mike muttered. Christian heard Alex start to lay into Mike as he threw a twenty on the table and followed Travis toward the door.
About JP Barnaby
Award winning romance novelist, J. P. Barnaby has penned over a dozen books including the Working Boys series, the Little Boy Lost series, In the Absence of Monsters, and Aaron. As a bisexual woman, J.P. is a proud member of the GLBT community both online and in her small town on the outskirts of Chicago. A member of Mensa, she is described as brilliant but troubled, sweet but introverted, and talented but deviant. She spends her days writing software and her nights writing erotica, which is, of course, far more interesting. The spare time that she carves out between her career and her novels is spent reading about the concept of love, which, like some of her characters, she has never quite figured out for herself.
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